Almost four years ago our family left the Hawaiian islands seeking out care for Leah as she wrestled with Post Dramatic Stress Distorter after fell to pieces saying, “I killed someone, accidentally. . . I killed someone! I can't believe those three little words sit together in a cozy little sentence about my life! I'd like to squeeze "accidentally" somewhere in the middle there. Though it's true, it doesn't fit. There it is: subject/verb/object. . . and I add the qualifier. With or without it, how can this be? I can barely believe it. And after all these years, why does it hurt so badly? You know what is really hard? No one is only someone. Everyone is John... is Nicole... is Leah... I killed Nicoletta... strong, beautifully blossoming Nicoletta, and I did it accidentally -I’ve made a fatal mistake that can’t be undone.”
Then months seemed to endlessly rolled bye and then Leah meet Pat Edumussen. Pat is a professional therapist that specializes in E.M.D.R. treatment. Leah and Pat meet on a weekly basis until Leah’s release from treatment in December 2010. It was during that time Leah began to write down a recollection of her journey down at fatalmistake94.blogspot.com
In the following months I watched Leah walk through some major transformations. Then in June of 2010, Leah started encouraging me to revisit our dreams of overseas & cross-cultural ministry. She would often say, “God is about restoration. It was our choice to return to Washington for my health. I don’t think God wouldn’t change His mind about things He placed in our minds and hearts long ago.”
Months later I decided to see Pat Edumussen (Leah’s PDSD therapist) about working through some questions, personal hurtles, and seemingly mental / emotional roadblocks (just ask Brett Huf, Aaron Oldenburg, Todd Cloud, Kiha Pimental or Larry Drinen about the funky questions I couldn’t answer). Then in May of 2011 Leah felt God prodding her to encourage me again. This time I sent out a letter seeking wisdom & prayer to six trusted individuals. Our decision as of Oct / Nov 2011 is to not shrink back; due to, past situations, personal fear, or future un-assurances. To accept a pastoral position at New Hope Windward and return to Oahu in Jan 2012.
Yep, you heard things right - we’re moving back to Oahu! Yes, we still have some hurtles before us (physically and emotionally). However, we plan on overcoming them hand in hand as we move forward. What will I be doing at New Hope Windward? I’ll be a team Pastor, overseeing small group development, vision implementation, technology integration, care, weddings, funerals, global mission support, etc....
It’s been amazing to watch God’s hand turn what some would call a ‘fatal mistake’ into a journey of New Hope. A special thanks to Pat Edmundson (MA LMHC), Aaron Campbell (ND), Grace Community Church, and YOU!
If you have any questions please don’t hesitate to swing bye our house, give me a ring, toss me a text, facebook / tweet me, or visit our f.a.q. page online.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail."
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